French Association of Gay and Lesbian Parents and Prospective Parents
Association des Parents et futurs parents Gays et Lesbiens 

European Parliament, 17 June 1998
 Homoparental Families in France 1998
Reality and Discriminations

 Talk by Eric Dubreuil,
President of APGL (Association des parents et futurs parents gays et lesbiens),
French association of gay and lesbian parents and parents-to-be,
Author of "Des parents de même sexe" (Same-sex Parents),
published by Odile Jacob, Paris, 1998.

 I. Reality

 The number of members of APGL has grown rapidly from 75 in 1995 to more than 600 in June 1998, making APGL one of the biggest associations in the traditionally non-associational French gay and lesbian landscape.

From a sociological standpoint, the proportion of homosexual persons in a society is usually considered to be between 2% and 8%, depending on such criteria as the meaning given to the expression "to be homosexual", the technical characteristics of the survey (phoning, mailing, face-to-face, etc), or, last but not least, the openness or homophobia of the person conducting the survey.

Choosing an intermediate figure, we shall assume that about 5% of persons are "homosexuals" in most Western societies.

A recent survey (January 1997), carried out by BSP for the French gay magazine Têtu, and involving over 1000 persons as representative as possible of what is a "non-identified population", reveals that 7% of gays and 11% of lesbians are already parents, while 36% of gays and 45% of lesbians wish to be parents.

Even if these figures are subject to further confirmation in the future, they illustrate the following two contemporary facts.

1. There is a profound change in the way homosexual persons themselves consider their future. They no longer assume that being homosexual prevents them from having offspring.

2. In France, hundreds of thousands of people are concerned by the duality homosexuality / parenthood. In Europe, millions of persons are concerned by the duality homosexuality / parenthood.

I.B.1. Visibility

The growing visibility of the gay and lesbian population constitutes a profound change in attitudes. In particular, gay and lesbian parents or parents-to-be are no longer mute and hidden. They increasingly call for their situations to be taken into account and for the discriminations they still suffer to be eradicated.

On the one hand, they make claims towards society (see part II).

On the other hand, they invite professionals on family matters for collective reflection on such concepts as parenting, multiple parent situations, the three types of filiation (biological, legal and social), adoption, or assisted reproduction. Such reflection involves new conceptions of the family and directly or indirectly involves all kinds of families, not only gay and lesbian families.

I.B.2. Studies

Studies about homoparental families are still almost inexistent in Europe, whilst more than 200 studies have already been conducted in the USA. In 1997, APGL published its "Petit Guide Bibliographique à l’usage des familles homoparentales et des autres" (Small Bibliographic Guide for Homoparental Families and Others), which lists and summarises these American studies. None of the studies shows that children would be handicapped by being raised in homoparental families. None of the studies shows that homosexual parents would be worse parents than heterosexual parents.

We would like to see more studies in Europe, because, although their objective should not be to validate or invalidate something that is already part of many citizens' lives, they would probably give interesting points of view on new family structures.

I.B.3. Symposium and publications

APGL organised a symposium on gay and lesbian families in Europe in Paris in June 1997. Representatives from various European countries, such as Denmark, Belgium, the Netherlands, and Spain, related their experience of gay and lesbian families in their own countries.

Family professionals (lawyers, psychologists, ethnologists, sociologists, etc.) also contributed to the general reflection. These debates and contributions are published in a book entitled "Actes du Colloque des familles gayes et lesbiennes en Europe".

Lastly, the first French book about gay and lesbian families, "Des parents de même sexe" (Same-sex Parents) by Eric Dubreuil, was published last month by the Paris publishing house Odile Jacob.

I.B.4. Programmes against homophobia

As our children are sensitive to homophobia and may be hurt by the way in which they are looked upon by other people, APGL is planning to creating and participate in all kinds of programmes whose purpose is to eradicate discrimination and day-to-day homophobia at school or in any other public area.

II. Discriminations

II. A. Judicial discriminations

II.A.1. Divorce and separation of heterosexual couples

Judges and experts still all too often consider that a homosexual orientation is a problem for the education of children, although no study has ever confirmed such prejudice. It is not unusual to find discriminatory provisions in the texts of judgements, for instance: [the (gay) father is allowed to see his children "provided he protects them from his private life" or "he will not make them meet his friend"]. More subtly, discriminations may take the following form: [as this (lesbian) mother "shows no wrong or out-of-place behaviour towards her child", she will be allowed to see them normally ]. By reinforcing anti-homosexual prejudices and by disqualifying relations between persons of the same sex, such discrimination creates a deep conflict of loyalties in the child and increases the difficulty children have in maintaining good relations with their homosexual parent.

 II.A.2. Adoption by single persons

In France, single persons or married couples can apply to be adoptive parents. In France and in other European countries (such as Belgium), people who wish to adopt children must be "approved" by the authorities, so as to avoid children being adopted by persons or by couples who are not able to guarantee the children a good environment. In France, if, during the approval proceedings, a person reveals his/her homosexuality, he/she has no chance of being given approval. However, if people do not speak of their homosexuality, they are given approval in the same statistical proportions as heterosexual people. This fact is evidence of real discrimination, made worse by the fact that lying is thus encouraged by the authorities.

A case is currently before the European Commission of Human Rights concerning the refusal by the French authorities to give approval to a gay man who did not conceal his sexual orientation and who was denied approval on the sole basis of his sexual orientation, without any specific argumentation. We trust that there will soon be a positive solution to this case.

 II.B. Discriminations by limitation or absence of civil rights

 II.B.1. Adoption by a couple

In the belief that adoption by two persons of the same sex would destroy the symbolism of the heterosexual filiation, the French authorities refuse to allow two persons living in a stable relationship to jointly adopt a child. The authorities curiously seem to prefer single-parent adoption to adoption by a same-sex couple (whereas the triangulation is better performed in the latter than in the former), arguing that the child will not be able to represent the initial act of his or her conception, thereby confusing biological and legal filiation.

Furthermore, same-sex couples are not yet recognised in French law, whereas they are in countries such as the Netherlands, Denmark and Sweden. However, even in these latter countries, the right to adopt children has not yet been given to homosexual couples, although in the Netherlands, a law relating to adoption will probably soon be passed. The most liberal country in the world is currently the USA. In December 1997, New Jersey, for example, expressly authorised gay and lesbian couples to adopt jointly.

II.B.2. Adoption by the second parent

Within same-sex couples where a child is related by filiation to only one parent (for example, he/she has been adopted by a single person or was conceived by artificial insemination or through a surrogate mother), the child lacks a stable legal environment. Although the child may have been conceived or adopted by the will of two persons and is brought up in daily life by two persons, only one of the child's two social parents is legally recognised by society. It is an everyday problem (authorisation at school, medical emergencies, etc.) and a real danger for the child if his or her sole legal parent were unfortunately to die. It would be easy to introduce second parent adoption into the law. APGL is now working with law specialists in France so as to allow this kind of kinship through adoption simple. This could, if not solve the whole problem, at least lead to some progress.

II.B.3. Recognition and rights for co-parents

An increasing number of parental projects are being undertaken in which a gay and a lesbian, either or both of whom live with a same-sex partner, wish to have children. They form what we could call "extended families". These three or four persons are behind the birth of the child. Nevertheless, only two of them - the biological parents - are recognised by society. The link between the children and their "third" and "fourth" parents is currently unable to be institutionalised, although the children benefit from their day-to-day involvement. This impossibility at law is bad for the children as well as for the persons who wish to be recognised as having rights and duties towards the children. Co-parental status needs to be created.

II.B.4. Equal access to assisted reproduction: artificial insemination for women and surrogate motherhood for men.

This debate, one of the more complex in contemporary society, often reveals a lack of information in public opinion. In some countries, artificial insemination is allowed irrespective of the sexual orientation and the marital status of the applicant (e.g. Belgium, the Netherlands). In others, surrogate motherhood is allowed (e.g. Great Britain and many states in the USA). In some other countries (e.g. France), this medical act is subject to a bioethical regulation that refuses assisted reproduction treatment to lesbian and gay persons.

When debate takes place on assisted reproduction, it is not unusual to hear arguments against equal access to these techniques for gays and lesbians which refer to non-recognition of the biological purpose of such treatment or the problems the children would encounter later in having access to their origins. These two issues, however, concern both heterosexual and homosexual applicants.

 II.B.5. Same-sex unions

Although parenthood is and will probably increasingly become disconnected from couple relationships, the reality shows that same-sex couple recognition (whether by extended cohabitation, union contracts, or marriage) is a powerful factor of integration and stability for gays and lesbians who wish to engage in a long-term relationship which includes the desire to be a parent. This explains why APGL is involved in the recognition of same-sex couples and, in 1996, was even the first French association to claim equal access for same-sex persons to any institution relating to the couple, including marriage.

 III. Conclusion

 In conclusion, I would like to emphasise the following four points.

• Discrimination still exists in Europe. It is often strong and harsh, even - and especially - if untold and unseen by those who operate it. The most dangerous effects of discrimination are those of a hidden plague, those internalised by the very persons at whom the discrimination is aimed. They are even more dangerous when the persons discriminated against believe they have some interest in letting the discrimination continue, by adopting such attitudes as: "we are not so badly treated", "in other parts of the world, it is worse", "in saying we are discriminated against, don't we risk being treated even worse?" ...

• The thought processes of gays and lesbians in Europe are currently undergoing rapid change. Until recently, homosexuality was associated with the two burdens of secrecy and guilt. These two heavy weights are gradually being lifted and being replaced by visibility and responsibility. Such progress is and will be an important contribution to eradicating all kinds of discrimination, because awareness of discrimination allows no exceptions, whether it is related to ethnic characteristics, religious beliefs, sexual orientation, or anything else.

• A dialogue must be established and strengthened between persons who feel the effects of discrimination in their day-to-day lives and those who are in charge of social and legal regulations in our societies.

• Citizens in our modern and contemporary societies must be able and be encouraged to contribute, if they so wish, to the development of the society as a whole. They must be able to exploit their full potential. For that, they need to be reassured through recognition at law and by their peers. Increasing their self-esteem will allow them to contribute to the general and collective interest and to the future of all.
  It is a moral and political responsibility for elected persons and governments in our countries to favour the expression of humanity in all its forms.

I thank you for your invitation and I trust these initiatives will be successful in creating new forms of citizenship throughout Europe.

Strasbourg, 17/06/98

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